I had the privilege of getting an advanced screening pass for this film, and let me tell you, I was not impressed.

A string of sex jokes, a gay family, some more sex, and then it ends. What tries to be a comedy ends up dragging on for too long and just seeming bland.

So, the movie’s main characters are a gay couple, not too bad of a start. Both the butch mother(Nic) and more feminine mother(Jules) have had kids from the same sperm donor(Paul). One of the kids appears to be a girl named Joni and a son named Laser. Joni is about to graduate off to college with Laser still in high school.

Early on in the movie, it is evident that Laser wants to find his biological father, which happens with little to no effort. This man is Paul, and from there he has an interesting relationship with the kids.

This whole time of course, the cast is cracking sex jokes about being gay or lesbian, and taking liberties that we as an audience don’t realize that the movie is nothing more than a string of sex jokes.

After watching this movie for some time, you start to realize that the plot details are barely interconnected. For instance, the main conflict in the movie, which is that Jules does end up sleeping with Paul, does not get resolved by the end. There are a large number of side plots that seem like they could have developed into something, that eventually amount to absolutely nothing. Some key characters in these side plots aren’t even given a name!

When we get around to the end of the film, you start to realize as you glance nervously at your watch that there is no way in hell that they can tie up all the loose ends in this film. And then you sit and wait. And what? It ends. That’s it, for some reason, everyone in the family is happy again – Paul is never heard about again. Wait what? Did a major player in the whole film just suddenly drop off the face of the earth? Did the movie just leave as many as 3 plots unresolved? The major conflict untouched? What honestly happened here?

Cholodenko goes so far as to make everyone at the end of the movie smile, and then cut us off. No explanation of what happened, no story ending, no plot conclusion. Just ending. The end.

So, I modestly rate this movie a 5/10. Not a great rating, and I will elaborate on why I feel this way…

The End

So, a few days ago I saw the new movie Knight and Day, I was appalled, it royally sucked. Here is my review.

What is little more than a Mr. and Mrs. Smith rip features not enough action to be a James Bond thriller and not enough comedy to be even mildly entertaining.

Yes, I said it, it’s nothing more than a Mr. and Mrs. Smith rip off. Well, there are two main characters. An international super spy, and his girl friend. What do they do? They end up fighting a huge corrupt organization together. There is some super battery that the hero, Roy Miller ( Tom Cruise), just happens to have. His new lady friend, June Havens (Cameron Diaz), is for some reason never fully explained to us involved in the matter. And now, they have to stick together.

This movie tries hard. It tries hard to be an action film. It tries hard to be a comedy. It really sucks at being either. Filled with a plot which is unexciting and is less interesting than most video game plots. There is a touch of romance mixed into this movie as well, but due to the wish to make it PG it lacks in even that regard. We see them together, and that’s about it. Why are they together? Where did the chemistry come from? We don’t know, we will never know.

No original content. Like. Seriously. There is even one scene which goes so far as to have them riding on a motorcycle where the female is riding backwards, facing the male, shooting. Now where have we seen that before? Oh right, Tomorrow Never Dies, that original James Bond movie.

I was not impressed with the plot at all. It did not inspire me. It did not entertain me. The story doesn’t feed you enough information at the beginning, and when it realizes that, it starts to cram you full of all the stuff in a boring manner. I’m sure the actual filming went something like this.

“Oh no! We didn’t provide all the facts!”

“It’s okay, just get some boring shots of peoples faces explaining in excruciatingly little detail about what may or may not be happening/have happened!”

And then they went to shoot. The camera work is not the greatest either, the progression made even more boring by the continued focusing on faces and not enough action.

All in all, not a great movie. Not even a good movie. I would rate it a 4/10. This movie goes nowhere, does nothing and it is evident. Save your money and wait for this one to be out on the television.